Tuesday, July 15, 2008

To Test or Not To Test....

that is the question??? ARGH!! So, I've been documenting AF in this blog regularly, as I also write it on my calendar. So, I got o looking back and the last trace of the witch was back in May sometime. I know I didn't have AF in June, but I chalk that up to these damned kidney stones (two still to pass). Of course I had bloodwork done when I went to the ER for the excruciating pain that went along with kidney stones, and that beta was a BFN in mid-June. My cycles have been so messed up since the chemical pregnancy and the methotrexate shot that I'm not surprised AF is in absence. But, for the record her not coming AT ALL since May is bothersome to me. I hold out hope that maybe just possibly I might be, but then again I have better things to spend my money on than a pregnancy test that is going to be yet another BFN notch to the bedpost. So, I debate and I wonder which hand or curiosity will weigh out???

My game plan....to hold out on testing for as long as I have the willpower to do so or until AF "possibly" makes her nasty arrival. I just dread another BFN, b/c then that warrants a call to the OB/GYN and a script of nasty provera or prometrium. Send esome BFP and babydust vibes this way, b/c even though we weren't trying another miracle surprise would be nice.

Edited to say: My willpower didn't last that long, and I had to go to the Dollar Store to pick up a couple things any way so I bought a test, and tested......just as I thought.....BFN.....boo-hiss. Looks like I'll be calling the Dr. tomorrow. :(

2 comments:

  1. I'm sorry, hon. As I was reading, I got all hopeful that maybe we could both have surprises...but then the bad news was at the end. BFNs suck. Hugs.

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  2. *hugs* I'm sorry that things are so out of whack... And sorry for the BFN.. I'd have to agree with Meredith on that one... They do definitely suck.

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